Tag Archives: equal rights

You Could Have Just 2….



Remember in your youth the phrase “Think before you speak”
was told over and over by the adults around you? It always amazed me how some
adults could speak out both sides of their mouths. At what point did we lose
our willingness to engage our brain before inserting our foot? Was it when we
realized there was no longer a consequence for our remarks or was it when we
learned the first amendment? Regardless of the reason, toying with someone life
in words should have consequences.
Being diagnosed with epilepsy this concept was evident even
to an eleven year old. Listening to doctors ask questions that would leave even
the most hardened adult confused and belittled. No medical reason for the
epilepsy like brain trauma or birth defect questions were asked like “could you
conjure one (a seizure) up for me?” “You could be wearing your ponytail too
tight”, “Are you sure you aren’t just imagining this?”  Twenty-two years of being treated like it was
all in my head until one sentence was uttered, 70 to 80% of all seizures have
no known cause. What? I’m a normal oddity? That one sentence if uttered at any
point 20 years earlier would have changed so much.

Then later in life, after the birth of a beautiful baby boy,
the request for birth control was made. For some reason the myths of women on
neurological medications would either have horrible birth defect consequences or
women on these meds tend to forget to take their birth control ran rampant
through the medical society. The practice of tying tubes or tubligation would
be my only option. I was sterilized because of my mythical inability to
remember to take my birth control.
Adults and physicians were not the only ones to mentally and
emotionally wrestle with, there is another stumbling block that for most of us
would be the last place we would encounter little or no understanding.

From my catechism teachings I don’t remember the heroes and
heroines of the bible being submissive. They were aggressive and empowered, why
should I have been any different?

“You could have just” can be a very powerful statement when
used the right way. The next time you see a child or a woman being abused and
stand by and do nothing. Look into their eyes and see “you could have just held
me or gotten me out; you could have just called someone in my time in need”.

The next time you are fighting over truths and half-truths,
look into their eyes and see “you could have just told me up front I can take
it, you could have just been braver than me this time”.

The next time you pretend to understand a person’s anguish,
step back one minute and take a look and you will see, “you could have just
been there wholly instead of pretending to know, you could have just silently
listened as my world fell apart – opinions were not needed just then”.

So please, if you get anything out of this, finish this
sentence before you change the life of a child, a victim, a friend, a
co-worker, patient, a parishioner, or anyone for that matter.

You could have just…..just what? Think about that the next
time you speak a half truth or your belief, is it better for you or the person
receiving it?


Ms. Livingston I Applaud You


In the news, Facebook, at water-coolers and coffee breaks across our land, a newswoman’s graceful and poignant stance being discussed. Jennifer Livingston took a very sharp stab at her weight from a viewer and turned it into a positive. I watched Ms. Livingston’s four-minute piece, and for me, the best part of it was when she spoke of parents teaching their children by example. Good or Bad, children watch us adults and learn what is wrong and right according to you. The habits you display are the habits they pick up and cleaning and smoking aren’t the only ones.

October is Anti-Bullying Month, and for those of you in Minnesota, bullying has been center stage for a few years in our state. The old adage “Kids will be Kids” is no longer acceptable and is no longer in our schools and playgrounds. It is not tolerated as adults as we look at the recent incident on the light rail of a man who started yelling racial slurs or the recent road rage incident that unfortunately ended in a shooting in a police parking lot. Child bullies become adult bullies because their parents or adult figure is or was a bully.

Bullied children are verbally abused about their appearance and behavior than color or creed. Thirty-three percent of the middle and high school students surveyed agree or strongly agrees that teachers can stop bullying. This means that 2/3 of these students are not confident that they can get help from their teachers when bullied.

Male bullying more commonly consists of verbal and physical abuse, because female bullying more commonly involves more verbal abuse and social bullying by spreading of rumors. Eighty-three percent of bullying incidents receive no intervention and continue to happen. Children who are bullies four times more likely to engage in criminal behavior in adulthood and often develop suicidal thoughts.

October has two Anti/Awareness Campaigns, one is for Bullying and one is Domestic Violence and I am very aware of the connection between the two. The unlikely intervention because it goes unreported, thinking that a report is useless because a teacher or police officer cannot fix it immediately the first time it happens. How your self-worth becomes lower and lower in your stomach.

It is Anti Bullying Month, notice it is not Bullying Awareness Month, we need to do the same with Violence…….make us anti not aware.

Calling women legislators


The recent hearings in the Minnesota Legislature about the definition of marriage
amendment have placed lawyer against lawyer, pastors against priests against
ministers, parents against parents, and veteran against veteran. Those are just
a few that have testified during these committee hearings.

I found it very interesting that the rights of African
Americans and women were used as compost in this amendment debate. I also found
it interesting that words like humanity, civil rights, christian, patriot,
foundation, and pro create further boosted the stink content.

As a feminist and someone taught by the best
how to throw an awl in the chain drive , it is necessary to point out a few
things to our current elected representation. To Representatives Kiffmeyer,
Lohmer, Franson, Mack, Scott, Myhra, Fabian, Doepke, Peppin, D. Anderson,
McElfatrick, Erickson, and Senators Koch, Robling, Fischbach, Benson, Wolf, I
would like to remind you of a wonderful statement about constitutional rights
made this year by Supreme Court Judge Scalia. His Justice made the point that the
only rights women have constitutionally is the right to vote. That is correct ladies,
vote, other than that you have no constitutional protection or privilege what so ever. Law’s and bills
that make it okay for you to run for election, to serve next to your male colleagues
and to make our schools, cities, counties, state, or country a better place. But
constitutionally, you have no right sitting in that seat, yet you are
allowing a constitutional amendment to take away the rights of others.

Ladies, you have the right to vote, that’s it, use it
wisely. Because next election the feminists of this state will use their one
and only constitutional right to make sure you cannot exercise your right